How to Deal With Difficult People?

How to Deal With Difficult People?

written by: Mr. Rudi Zimmerer
by: Mr. Rudi Zimmerer
Crop for Crop for

It is the best for us to deal with difficult people because it will extend our personality, we will learn different views/opinions, to accept other people and maybe to understand ourselves much better...

There was a famous therapist at my previous Guru, he complained about, how rude, difficult had been his roommates... My Guru said: It was best what I could do for you. Because these difficult people will transform your life and at the end, you will become a much better therapist who can love everybody.

Similar things had also happened to me when I was working,... My chief said, for instance, you are the only guy who can deal with them, or in the Ashram I had to deal with suicides, mad and violent people,...

The biggest problem is that we think we can't... That we stop ourselves out because of some stupid resistance, that we see the problem as unsolvable. In any case, we are the problem because there always exist people who can deal with these difficult people!!!

How to deal with dictators as our chief?

For instance, we have made a mistake, and our chief is getting mad...

Simple we say: You are right, I have done wrong.... How can I do it better, what will you recommend? The strategy is simple: getting him the wind out of his sail, calm him down, admit that we are not always perfect. If we have done so, we can start to persuade him. For instance that we feel sorrow about that, and how would it be if we could improve the situation that such mistake will never happen again?

Actually, this is the perfect Aikido strategy, we follow first our Attacker, and then we lead our Attacker in our direction where we want him. - And this with less power.

Next example, how to deal with Jealousy? Our partner thinks that we have an affair. Make a joke out of it! Your partner is phoning you, and ask where you are? You reply by my new girl/boyfriend... Your partner is coming home and thinking where is she. You say, Please look under the bed, I have hidden her there... If she is not under the bed maybe she is in the cupboard or in the bathroom....

We deal with people who knows everything better (for instance our spouse). We are driving our car; our spouse: Do you see the traffic light? You are driving too fast... The solution we mirror our spouse. For instance, we say: There is a traffic light. Oh, I am too fast, it is only 50Km/h, and I am 55Km/h...

In the meantime, I have read books about that topic: Dealing with people you can't stand./Dr. R. Brinkman. Coping with difficult people./A. M. Uhl. Both Books are great for dealing with difficult people. Also, I got this great persuasion program on mp3: The Code of Influence, from Paul Mascetta; In this program, we also learn, how to persuade Difficult People.