Pull and push factors

Pull and push factors

written by: Ilana Stankler
by: Ilana Stankler

Push and pull factors not only occur when we're thinking about changing jobs and what may push and pull us to accept one job over another, but push and pull factors also apply to life, particularly relationships.

It's not something we stop to think about because relationships are often formed on an unconscious level. What starts as a fairy tale beginning can sometimes turn into something dramatic and explosive. It might be the never-ending back and forth that plays havoc on what may seem to have started as a happy, tolerant and compassionate relationship.

Sadly, arguments aren't just subjected to a relationship between two people. The push and pull factor can happen at any time, but often start when relationships begin to bed down and our unconscious experiences set in. As relationships continue, the push and pull factor becomes a daily fixture, brought about through our many experiences and then outside interferences.

Where we're expected to fall into line with other people's lives, fallouts may start to occur. There may also be other push and pull factors to consider. It depends on the relationship and why unions are initially formed. Not everyone goes into a relationship for the right unconscious reasons, it depends what we're running away from. Relationships sadly aren't always based on love.

Sometimes we form relationships to escape difficult home lives, difficult parents, looking for stability and financial gain, but if it's a case of boy meets girl, girl meets girl, or boy meets boy and the only factor is true love, those relationships will stand the test of time.

Finally, when we come into relationships with emotional unconscious wounds, there will always be pull or push factors attached to those relationships.

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