Recently, I've been in the energy of "I Don't Know." It's a very interesting energy – at the same time scary and liberating. Not knowing has me feeling a bit like a boat without a rudder, as though I'm floating along without a firm plan. The good thing about being in the energy of not knowing is the ability to go with the flow. When there's no firm plan, I find it much easier to adjust to whatever comes my way, with no hooks into how something should be based on my own expectation of it.
Many of the people who come to see me for counselling are in this energy; they don't know something and so they come to me for clarity, solutions and answers. It might be "I don't know what to do with my life." ... or "I don't know how she feels about me." ... or "I don't know if I should make that move or take that job offer."
Often, I'll suggest they re-frame their question into "I'd like to know what to do with my life." or "I'd like to know if she likes me or if I should move or take that job." By changing the way in which they ask the question, they instantly change the way in which the information comes to them. By saying "I'd like to know" they're letting the universe know that they're ready to hear the answers and take guided action on those answers.
However, we aren't always ready to hear the answers, or to do what is required of us to make those solutions become reality. So, we sit in the energy of "I don't know". What I'm realizing, beyond the need not to judge ourselves harshly for not knowing something, is that "I don't know" can be a very powerful place to be. There can be liberation in truthfully stating that we don't have all the answers and solutions just yet. Sometimes, being in the not knowing opens up space around us for many more possibilities to show up in our life than we would have seen in our conviction of knowing.
What if you could get excited about not knowing – instead of feeling anxious or dumb or uncertain? What if there could be space in the not knowing to simply allow yourself to shrug your shoulders and say "In this moment I don't know what's going to happen next! I don't know if she likes me, I don't know what I should do with my life and I don't know if I should move or take that job." This acknowledgement could open a world of possibilities and ways of thinking that have never occurred to you before this moment.
The need to know reflects a need to be in control, which in and of itself is an illusion – being in control isn't possible; being responsible and accountable is possible, but not being in control. You release the illusion of being in control when you say "I don't know" and allow that to be a good thing.
The need to know also reflects a desire to orchestrate the future. The future is a nebulous place, hard to pin down in any moment and always in motion and flux. You can certainly be responsible and accountable for the plans you make for the future and you can affect your experience of the future through your intention, but you cannot control the future. There are far too many variables. The point is to flow into, out of and around your experiences – not to control them.
I invite you to not know a few things, such how someone else is going to behave or how Sunday dinner is going to turn out, or what gift you might receive. Allow your life to reveal itself to you as the best gift you can give to yourself and enjoy the possibilities that are presented. I don't know what will happen when you do this but I think it could be good!